The Tree

When our anxious hearts are wrecked with pain and fear and dispair, it’s only natural for the anxiety to engulf us. We become our thoughts. We become our fears; the smallest and the biggest. Life becomes so small. Were entrapped in a cycle of mental anguish which tears through our bodies causing so much pain and distress that not a part of us is left unscathed.

That is anxiety.

It sounds so small and so simple; a nothingness. But oh my Lord does it become your EVERYTHING. It becomes your every waking thought and feeling. It disfigures your thinking; You can’t make plans;You can’t face people; You want to be alone with your thoughts. But being alone is the scariest thing in the world. You need people. But only YOUR people.

But I fear if you’re reading this then you know all this already.

Today I wanted to share something a bit different that came to me after I’d read a beautiful article on Tiny Buddha. And also thinking of people close to me who are currently suffering.

Each one of us is a tree. We have deep roots forged in a life lived and a history through our family and heritage. We have a strong trunk of experience and memories. And then we have branches with leaves reaching out from us. They come from our hearts, if you like.

Each one of these branches is a part of you; Part of your personality; your heart; your soul. It’s what makes you you. It’s what makes you tick. It’s What makes you laugh. It’s What makes you make other people laugh.

And then there are the leaves. These leaves are the thoughts we have. There are literally hundreds and thousands and they stem from the branches of us.

Now most of these branches are strong, bright and beautiful. Their leaves shine in the sunlight. But there is one branch that is struggling. It’s a little sad looking, even though it’s trying.

This one struggling branch is anxiety. There is a whole tree’s worth of great branches and leaves, but all the same that branch struggles.

But that one struggling branch doesn’t make the whole tree any less beautiful. And when admiring the tree, nobody focuses on that one struggling branch or those few dull leaves. They see the beauty of the whole tree. They see the strength and elegance and ages of wisdom.

When we are caught up in spirals or episodes of bad anxiety; when it consumes our life, it’s so easy to forget that there are other parts to us. It’s easy to forget our beauty and grace and zest for life. Our hobbies, our interests and our passions. We see only that one branch, the one that struggles. And we focus only on that. We focus only on all that fear.

What I’m trying to get across my anxious hearts, is that there is so much more to you than anxiety. It may consume every part of you right now, but that doesn’t mean that all your amazing qualities and strengths and history and wisdom, have gone. They are still there. Shining beautifully for all to see. It’s just that we forget. We forget that we are more than anxiety. We forget how we make people feel good. How we make people happy just from our smile. We forget that we are smart, we are kind, we are beautiful and we are important. We forget that we are made up of so much more than one small part of us. We are a whole. And that goodness in our hearts is still there, It never goes away.

So if your struggling right now, anxious hearts, then just for a moment be kind to yourself. Give yourself persmission to cut yourself some slack and give yourself some Compassion. You’re doing amazing at getting through. Especially at the moment with what’s happening in our worlds. But remember this: anxiety is only one small branch of a whole tree of beauty. And that tree is YOU.

Onwards Always my loves. Kiki xox